By Steve Stricker

Columnist

“The Gift of the Magi,” first published in “The New York Sunday World” on December 10, 1905, is one my favorite stories written by one of my favorite authors – O. Henry (Sydney Porter), about a young married couple and how with no money, just love, they met the challenge of acquiring Christmas gifts for each other…you know the story; if not, find that old movie or read the story – it will bring tears…well, did to me.

For a lot of us, rather than being the “Happiest time of the year,”  it can  be the saddest. There have been numerous Christmas’ brought about by me, that I didn’t’ have a single gift to open or put out any decorations.

These grief “anniversary” occasions, regardless of cause, when the world and others are together with loved ones, happy, joyful, many presents under the decorated tree in a festive decorated house, creates a focal point for loss with family scattered, deceased, alone, empty cold house, and dreadful financial circumstances that can place huge guilt not being able to buy gifts even though our heart aches to do so.

Years ago, divorced, between jobs, had no idea how I could possibly give Christmas gifts to my hero mom “Gert” and sons, Stephen, Scott, and Shane. Christmas is a time of miracles, so in deep prayer humbly asked our Lord, heavenly mother Mary, St. Joseph and Holy Spirit for help.

At another time in my life, having just married, the school district for which my wife and I worked lost funding for our jobs. Even though I had a master’s degree, employment was difficult. My then father-in-law had a friend who owned an asphalt company, and never fearing hard work went to work for him.

I worked four years with this company and it was the hardest, toughest, hottest, and best job I have ever had, and to finally be accepted by these tough, grizzled guys, and to realize skills I didn’t know I had, is one of the most satisfying accomplishments of my life.

Leaving to take a position with Southeast Missouri State University as a personal/career counselor, academic adviser and teacher, (which led me to Ole Miss to work and obtain my Ph.D.), I brought with me my large Case knife I carried every day and putty knife used to scrape asphalt off my loot and boots as they were symbols of the hard work I had done. 

For that Christmas, to my son Stephen, who had a strong work ethic with his studies, sports, employment, or whatever he undertook, I gave that old beat-up putty knife, still caked in hardened asphalt that meant so much to me, because he was such a hard worker.

To Scott, I gave the large Case single-blade knife that I loved, dinged and worn because he was tough as nails and could do anything.

From my youth, I had a small telescope in a leather case, one of my prize possessions, and gave this to Shane to discern the distant path he would one day journey.

Gert loved birds, had feeders and a weathered bird house in front of her kitchen windows so I took the old bird house, cleaned, repaired, painted, and glued a small figurine of Saint Francis on top for her.

Presenting each their gift, explained why I had chosen that particular item for them. It was so emotional for me, tears flowed down my face and I had difficulty getting the words out, but the boys and Gert said this was the best Christmas they ever had, and to this day it was for me as well.

Christmas should be about love and our Lord born in a humble manger…not palace.

Through it all, as now, was okay because of my total devotion to our newborn Lord. And perhaps I’ve already received my Christmas Miracle this year that I always look for as I struggled through a year of health issues, stressful medical tests, all good, and feel better than I have in years.

Happy, Merry Christmas – Look for that miracle, let go, totally trust God – it’s there….

Steve lives in Oxford and has his Ph.D. in Counseling from Ole Miss.